He's earning his place on the roster

Guess which catcher came into today's game with a .500 batting average and has maintained that average with another home run?

Jason Varitek.

(Okay, so if you've been paying attention this season, you might have guessed that, but I'm pretty sure you would not have predicted that a month ago).

So far, V-Mart has not exactly been fab as a catcher. Maybe keeping Varitek was the right move? Could there be a fight for the starting position?

Need I point out that Varitek's first name starts with 'J'? Huh?

And while we're asking questions, why didn't we get someone up from Pawtucket to replace Bill Hall in outfield? Not only is his fielding a disaster zone, his batting average is .000. And he's already played in 3 games. Seriously.

You thought I was kidding

Apparently, we haven't had enough of the 'J' shortstop:

'Before you ask the obvious question, here’s the answer: yes, the Red Sox were in on discussions for shortstop J.J. Hardy, who was traded from the Milwaukee Brewers to the Minnesota Twins earlier today.'

This explains a great deal about our interest in Julio Lugo, as well.

I've cracked Theo Epstein's Strategic Plan

So I've found a crucial pattern in this year's Red Sox leaders. See graphic. Note first letter of 87.5% of the guys there. Note that remaining 12.5% has an adjacent letter in the alphabet. Clearly we need more people whose names start with 'J.'

When I started thinking this through, though, I realized that maybe this was no co-incidence, since it seems that we have been accumulating numerous players whose name starts with 'J.' Think about it. Our entire outfield comprises of J-guys: JD Drew, Jacoby Ellsbury, and Jason Bay. We almost have an entire starting rotation made up of J-guys: Josh Beckett, Jon Lester, and Junichi Tazawa (what do you want to bet that Epstein gets Johan Santana in the off-season? Not very much, right, because now you see his plan!). Who do we keep putting in at shortstop? Jeb Lowry (even though I do not understand this since I think Alex Gonzalez has done very well....but now I've hit upon the answer). Of course, our closer is Jonathan Papelbon. Daniel Bard taking over that spot? Yeah, right!

This makes our trade of Justin Masterson all the more baffling. But I'm sure Theo has a plan to get him back.

Also, I hope that we aren't planning to re-sign Johnny Damon anytime soon.